The last six months have been really rough on my father who is the sole caretaker of my mother - well at least until this last month. In January, he had emergency eye surgery to take care of a seriously torn retina. He has had issues with blood sugar as he is a brittle diabetic. In late June, he fell off a ladder. A few days later, he went into massive seizures and was placed in ICU. He broke his arm and dislocated his shoulder during the fall. He then had to have emergency gall bladder removal. The surgeon said he even had gangrene in his gall bladder and it was the second largest this surgeon has ever removed. Today, he had his shoulder repair surgery.
My discoveries? Well I have been aware that my father ALWAYS doted on my mother and took care of her. She is not doing well in taking care of him however. She says that she is in a fibro flare and is incapable of taking care of him. She is all kinds of pitiful. As I am going through all of this, I am realizing that she is truly a narcissist in every sense of the word and always has been. This situation has opened my eyes and caused me to research narcissism more thoroughly and I have discovered a great deal about why I am the way I am. Ugh. If only I had noticed this 30 years ago. I might be a stronger person by now.
How the heck do you keep from allowing resentment to build? How do you get rid of resentment once it’s there? I am just over it already. Unfortunately, this is the beginning of my journey…